Scars don't have to be a sad reminder, they can breathe life.
My son began asking me how he was born and how he was in my belly. I showed him a photo of me pregnant. Of course as adults, we begin to think of creative ways to explain to a child without getting into the actual facts. Delivery, for me, is very easy to explain. I have a photo of the sixteen stables going across my abdomen from my second cesarean to show him where they cut him out. Yes...be envious...I get to skip the vagina explanation. I also have a lovely scar as proof. Right here! Right here! This is where they cut mommy in half for you! Scars. We all have them. For many people the ones left on the heart seem to be more impactful than the ones we can physically see. We have all heard the concept that until we, ourselves, are made whole, we shouldn’t be trying to find a partner. We know that someone else can’t fulfill us. The heart. An orchestrated system that takes in oxygen from the lungs and filters out carbon dioxide and other toxins to and from the body. A system that can run on its own. See my heart is functioning at full capacity, I don’t need any dialysis or machines to keep me up and running. Even if I have a few tears or blockages my body is constantly repairing, reviving, replacing and strengthening the walls of my cardiac muscle. Like our bodies, we too should be breathing in atmospheres of wellness and clearing out the smoke of toxicity. I’m ready to move on but that’s not what this blog is about. You see, I’m a party of three. Before I can begin to add more acts to my circus, I need to make sure the monkeys are well trained and confident in their daily shows. I feel as though many single people prepare themselves for relationships but don’t consider if their unit is ready. You and I can be amazing in our own time but what will the dynamic be as a family? The same way we need to be confident in who we are, make sure to not set expectations for our partners to fill places that are to be self fulfilled, we need to make sure our children are confident in their home dynamic. If my children aren’t secure and happy with me alone in our home, I can’t bring someone in and have them seek that person out for fulfillment. We have to fill our kids tanks up so that an additional component can be just that, an addition. Your partner’s place is not to pick up your slack! Not their job to replace your baby daddy or baby momma. Before you begin to date, I recommend you checking your starting line up. We have got to start thinking the big picture. I’ve began setting time aside to teach my kids the many concepts and ideas, such as gratitude, so I can transform their minds to think larger than life. To mold their hearts to be positive and optimistic. Make sure they are well mannered and respectful and that they understand their roles in my household. I want them to be comfortable in seeking me in all aspects of their lives. One day mommy will move on, and when she does I want their minds to be free of worry because they know we are a team. One person’s wounds have bound them. Another person’s scars have left them scarred and confined. I’ve taken the influences and transfused them into the bodies of those I love. I’m O+, a universal doner. As I donate I continue to be refilled. It’s time we stop doing what’s only good for us and start doing what’s greater for our families.